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Tobacco Tuesday – The Lies We Tell Ourselves

May 7, 2013

I’ve been thinking a lot about the lies we tell ourselves to get what we want.

As humans, we like to feel good, even if it means sacrificing how we feel later. It’s easy to tell ourselves we can deal with things later just as long as we can have this one high right here and now.

But the highs don’t get better if you lie to yourself to get them, and if you keep doing it, you no longer recognize it’s a lie; your comprehension of joy becomes damaged.

Kind of like if you stare out a window for very long, you don’t realize you’re looking through glass.

We shouldn’t be sacrificing feeling wholesome and honest for a spike up in the meter – and I’m telling myself this more than anyone.

To justify is easy. You can always circle around the real issue with justification, but if you have to keep talking yourself into why what you’re doing isn’t a problem, that seems to be a pretty good indicator that is exactly that.

We lie to ourselves because we’re too afraid to humble ourselves. We’re prideful creatures.

I remember Cornel West in the movie, Examined Life saying something along the lines of, it takes more courage to search your own soul than the lead a charge in battle. I wouldn’t know because I’ve never led a charge in battle, but I have examined my own soul and I know it’s not easy to accept your own failures time and time again. It’s exhausting and it’s deeper than the physical flesh, because the failures will always be there. Each one of us will continually fail day in and day out, but that’s why I believe we require grace.

And in order for us to accept grace, we must first be honest with ourselves about our mistakes.

And we’re all cut at the knees, so before you judge your neighbor, remember to humble yourself and there will no longer be room to judge – leaving room for grace and acceptance.

It seems everyone has a fear of failure in them, especially in our success driven culture.

That’s why most people think it’s best to play life safely and comfortably. But, to be truly humble, you have to face this fear every day, several times a day; and you learn to accept failure and reject the concept of success –  at least the way we seem to understand it, thus freeing you from its bindings. Taking risks become pretty routine.

When you don’t feel entitled to anything, you don’t have a reason to lie to yourself about anything and you don’t put your own enjoyment above others’.

We learn to forgive ourselves, and forgiving others starts with forgiving ourselves. It all starts from within.

Because when you understand you need grace, you understand we all need grace; you become more understanding; more loving; more willing to give a helping hand; and more honest with yourself and the people around you.

Let’s quit lying to ourselves so much.

Let’s grow.


Signing off,


Grace and Love.

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